Day 1: Neuroscience of Presence

-

 


He covers himself with his sheet almost every morning, huddling his wiggly body over the warm air blasting out of the floor vent. I'm kind of amazed at how hot he's willing to get, skin, itching red hot. 
I laid down on the floor beside him,  my vantage point his. Remnants of Special K cereal crushing under my leg. I push aside a thought...something about judging myself for not sweeping the floor earlier...
The truth of it is, I'm not sure if I want to be under that hot billowy shelter. Am I glad I'm on the outside? 
He discovers there is a hole in his sheet and says, "Hey mom, I can seeeee you! "
I'm afraid, if I were to be really fully present with him, sometimes, the entire situation would swallow me whole. I don't know if I could stand the heat.
But alas, there is also an invitation to join. Where Now is, there Christ is also, absorbing what I cannot.

As the poet Friedrich Hölderlin says, "Where danger lies, grows the saving also."

Comments

  1. Amy N.10/19/21, 10:57 PM

    So beautiful. Keep choosing joy and not judgement. I'll be following along. Looking forward to participating/sharing more with you soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Janell Downing10/20/21, 6:29 AM

      Thank you amy. Can't wait to see what you share on the journey.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Look into the sun as the new days rise

-
Image
For at least this past year, I've been wanting to try and put into words the beginning of a dream and how that dream became a reality. I'm not the best writer and I know that shouldn't matter but I always let it get in the way of me writing anything. The other struggle for me is that I have a lot of input in my life and not a lot of output. I love gathering information, thoughts, pictures, stories of purpose. But the thing is this, they're starting to get all muddled and I'm forgetting what their purpose was in the first place. And I really don't want to forget. I don't want to forget what my and my husband's dream was and how suddenly we've found ourselves doing a little bit of what we were made to do. So with this written piece of transition, this blog will take on a different purpose.  Our house now is serving as a space for sabbaticals and rest for people involved in the never-ending work of the Gospel. These are people who have been sent out b
Read more

more work (and play) of summer

-
Image
Oh wait! There's more! I believe I said there would be 2 videos in the last post, but there was only 1. Oops. So here is another Strategic Tool Implementation video demonstrating the, uh, push barrel. And because of the genius contraption of the Push Barrel, our backyard patio is almost finished! We acquired a ton of flagstone (for free), in which included a lot of good, hard work and the guys using their spatial skills. Jay built a fire pit too. (In which we may or may not be burning all sorts of "scraps" in...) Perfect for roasting mallows. Amy, our resident master gardener/green thumb also has made our garden quite the bountiful feast! (Well...and the 6 truck loads of aged-manured we dumped and tilled into the dirt!) On 1 pepper plant alone, she counted 15 (15!) peppers. One night, myself, Amy and Debbie had a washing, dicing, blanching and freezing party. We had turnips and rutabagas come out of our ears. So with a little help of Elton John and some old sch
Read more

Kitchen Apocalypse 2012

-
Our kitchen has, well,  undergone some "changes" recently. Upon seeing the new kitchen, the lack of familiarity may be startling to some, unwholesome to others, and downright obscene to a few less prepared souls.  In order to prevent any vomiting or other mass hysteria,  we have compiled a brief video to act as a guide for folks who may need to understand how such a change takes place. We did all of the work ourselves, from installing all new appliances, Hardwood cabinets, custom concrete countertops (not shown in this video, those are for later), new flooring, new walk-in pantry, new lighting (we had one all-or-nothing light switch,  now we have 4 separate options), new window, new sink and faucet; and the kicker is, it all cost less than $5000.
Read more