Day 27: posture and achieving productive stillness

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I remember the first time I was in the company of another who knew how to release and relax. She was my piano teacher. After I had already taught piano for 10 years and had a baby. I was so raw. I longingly would look at my piano. I needed to speak, with no words. 

My teacher, Mary, was one of those people who could push me just enough and hold a spacious place for me to fall too. I learned how to expand again. To breathe again. In and out. In and out.

As a little girl, I used to pretend that I played in an orchestra. I would sit and imaginary play through an entire soundtrack. I loved being a part of something grand. I'm trying to listen to that feeling again. To no longer be a burden-bearer. To not be afraid of my own vulnerability. It's hard now, when I'm around others who are so closed off. But their burdens are not mine to carry, and just as Mary's posture attracted me into compassion, I hope I can be that for others too.

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