To Care and Not to Care

This was a piece I wrote for my good friend Colette Eaton over at  https://coletteeaton.com/ . She's been doing a series on Faith Resiliency in Ordinary Time. She asked me, "How do I see my faith growing and being challenged during this time? How do I see the Holy Spirit moving?" If there's anything certain about 2020, it's certainly not ordinary. And yet, the Church finds itself once again in Ordinary Time - half of the church calendar year! There's nothing new under the sun and God knows that. He isn't afraid. So this is a reminder to myself and to you, whether you find yourself crushed or expanding, to look towards that ever present faith God so graciously gives us. May you press on with hope.  “Pour out your Spirit, Lord : that we might dream your dream.” (From the Book of Common Prayer).   “So I saw that there is nothing better for a man than to enjoy his work, because that is his lot. For who can bring him to see what will happen after hi...

So I'm fasting from social media right now. For Lent. You could say it's a spiritual maintenance thing. My uses for social media (mainly Instagram and Facebook) are multiple, but mainly they are a source of not dealing with my feelings. What I realized only 3 days in was that although I'm not on them alot collectively, I am on them for short bits several times throughout the day. My phone is usually on the kitchen counter, available and always in sight - triggering me to check something. (even my 3 yr old son will say "I just need to check something). On my 3rd day of fasting, in a moment of frustration with my kids I went to tap the alluring Instagram app. I immediately stepped back, alarmed at myself. Every time I have unwanted feelings and/or feelings I don't know what do with, I tap that trusty app. I zone out for a couple minutes. Then I jolt myself back into reality, having not dealt with whatever emotion I was trying to escape (in myself AND in my children)....